73 | LOVE - Fruits Week 1 (Paul Van Coller)
This episode kicks off our dadAWESOME 9-part series on the Fruit Of The Spirit as described in Galatians 5:22-23. Paul Van Coller is a phenomenal communicator of God’s Word and the pastor of Hope Church in George, South Africa. He is a great storyteller and inspires people to have more faith and risk more for God. His passion is planting churches in all corners of the world. Paul and his wife Marinette have been married for 16 years, have two awesome boys and both have been in active ministry for over 20 years. Before they re-planted Hope Church in George, South Africa in 2012 they were missionaries for 10 years with The Zambia Project which they pioneered and continue to lead.
Conversation Notes
- GIVE to the Fathers for the Fatherless 100 mile ride - webpage here
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- (4:41) Paul introduces his family and ministry
- (5:44) Our mission as a family is to honor God and see God's kingdom grow.
- (6:03) Cultural differences on fatherhood
- (7:14) Fun things Paul enjoys doing with his boys
- (8:12) Illustration of aligning arrows (priorities) in our lives and families
- (9:50) John 3:30 "He must increase, but I must decrease.”
- (10:38) Understanding our calling as a family
- (11:34) "We are together in this mission... I can't succeed as a dad or as a person in serving God and fulfilling what I feel God has called me to do unless we all fulfill what God has called us all to do."
- (12:15) "We're on this journey together. We celebrate the wins. We pray together for various things."
- (13:05) Paul describes how painful experiences brought him closer to God
- (13:57) "God is such a big God, and he loves us so much. He is for us. When we come to Him and bring our pain and suffering to Him… surrender it to Him, He is able to patch it all up and do something amazing with it"
- (14:35) Allow the manure of pain and past mistakes to become the fertilizer for reaping great relationships
- (15:23) Paul talks about what he learned from a past mistake
- (15:35) Be adaptive in our leadership and parenting because our kids are continually changing seasons in their lives.
- (16:30) Beginning conversation about the Fruit of the Spirit of LOVE
- (17:30) Biblical love is different than our cultures “romantic” love. Biblical love is sacrificial.
- (17:38) Love puts our families above our own needs and desires. We as men need to be willing to "die" first.
- (19:00) Find the balance between self-sacrifice and making an idol out of our families
- (20:05) Don't just pray that God would bless and grow our kids, but also pray to hear from God about our kids.
- (21:20) Story of coffee and intentionally slowing down
- (21:54) We need to force ourselves to stop, reflect, process, and get ready for what is coming next.
- (22:33) “The mistake that I was making, and that I think that many of us make, is that I was rushing from one thing to the next.”
- (23:13) If we take the time to stop with our kids it can leave to some of the best conversations.
- (23:28) Living lives of love does not happen in a rushed state
- (24:08) Make sure we are really present with our kids and we're really there in the moment.
- (24:29) Some people talk best while we're doing something. The conversation starts moving while we do something together.
- (25:25) Paul's time machine advice to his younger self would be to "Listen more and have more fun." Be intentional about making positive memories.
- (27:54) "My dream is that they would one day say I showed them what it looked like to radically follow God."
- (28:00) "Be full of faith, putting God's kingdom above our kingdom, and have fun along the way."
- (29:06) Parting advice: have fun, don't take yourself too seriously, and admit your mistakes.
- (30:10) "I pray that you would continue to give us the grace to love as you love us, God."